A Potential NEW View of Christmas Decorations...

Guess what I just found myself doing??? You are not going to F***ing believe this. I went on the tropical weather site because… THERE IS A TROPICAL STORM OUT THERE!!! They say it is going to go north, but I’m too damn damaged now folks. I hear there’s a TS and I think, “We’re DOOMED, I tell ya, WE’RE DOOMED!”

Can you imagine what a complete pain in the arse that would be? Christmas lights flying all over, fake reindeer being lifted away, outside Christmas trees become gigantic green missiles dispersing ornaments capable of vast wreckage.

Ugggggh. I shudder at the thought…

Two Thumbs Up!

Ahhhh… I made VW’s Chicken Tetrazzini tonight and it was every bit as good as I remember it. I won’t be making it much… as I was putting the ingredients together I realized just how fattening it really is, but oh it was so good! (VW, I saved you some and will get it to you Thursday.)

Big big hit with the kids too, which is always nice, although they agreed it tasted even better when they topped it with grated locatelli. EVERYTHING is better with MORE locatelli..

On a side note, blogger sucks big time tonight and I'm having a hell of a time posting... who knows what I'll have up by the tme you see this. I'm a working girl now, you know... I can't blog during the day! *wink*

I Suppose It's all in How you Look at It.

The kids decorated the tree tonight which means all the ornaments are only on the front and hang mostly below four feet from the floor…

My Reputation is Starting to Precede Me...

I was waiting to pick up Son#3 today from his afterschool art class. In my hand I held a music book for Son#1. There is a big Christmas concert that the band is having and I needed to make a copy of some music for him. I happened to see a Mom I knew, who was talking to a Mom I had only seen before, so I walked over. She asked me what I had in my hand. I told her I had to make copies for the Christmas concert and "You would not believe..." and before I could finish the sentence, the Mom said to me, "What in the hell did you get yourself into this time?" and the other Mom, this Mom I DID NOT KNOW, said, "D., what did they get you involved with this time? Even I hear the stories..." Not only did she know my name, but she 'had heard stories'? Yikes!

So I told them that the band director and I had been talking and I told him I still did pick up my flute and he asked me... to.participate.in.the.kid's.concert. He and I are doing some duet. I kid you not.

Now, allow me to make this clear, as I have said to him repeatedly, I am no longer a good flute player. I pick it up in June, usually the last two weeks, right before my family's 4th of July Ceilidh, in some great effort to be able to play a Scottish tune my father has picked out while he plays either the pipes (as in bag) or the fiddle. Then throughout the year, I may pick it up spontaneously and run through some scales or some old tune I still have sheet music for. That does NOT happen often.

However, now I am playing, I believe next week, for parents... with the band director. I see much shame ahead of me... shame and practicing. He picked out the tune for me to study and the first thing I said was, "Hmm. 3 flats. Didn't have anything with two or less, huh?" Thank God it wasn't 4.

Nice to know I have a reputation. And nice to know that I appear to be a source of entertainment for some of the parents...

The Nice Side of Florida

Muwahahahahahaha! Whilst those of you who live in the Great White North huddled looking for warmth, shoveled snow, and scraped ice off of windshields today....

Son#2 and I gardened!

It was beautiful today, 80 degrees, clear skies, and a wonderfully cool breeze. We planted the annuals and I will finish up tomorrow. Rows of flowers that should bloom next week, giving me color along my walkway.

The way I figured it, we received our share of crappy weather in September, mixed with a bit of a scare factor, and leaving a residual taste of leaky roofs and blown out screen patios yet to be fixed. I'm not saying it was worth it, I'm just saying today was nice...

I've Been Christmas Tree Damaged

On Wednesday night... the night before Thanksgiving, I was coming home from Karate when I noticed a car zipping by with a Christmas tree attached to its top. I did a double take. Something seemed inherently wrong with buying a tree before Thanksgiving. It was like on November 16th when I took my kids with me to Publix and the kid at the register said to me, "Santa is coming tonight. Are you bringing back your kids?"
I replied, "NOoooooo, it is not even Thanksgiving yet. We don't do Santa until AFTER Thanksgiving."
He pressed on, "But he'll be here tonight..." and I stopped him and said, "You may decorate for Christmas before Halloween. You may put out the Christmas baking section on 1 November. But... you cannot thrust Santa upon us BEFORE Thanksgiving. I won't do it."
He smiled and just said, "I understand." So when I called my Mom incredulously on Wednesday night and said, "You will not believe this, but I just saw a guy with a tree on his car and it's not even Thanksgiving!" she replied, "It is the tradition of some to decorate their tree on Thanksgiving."

Oh. Yeah. I forgot. I've just been so appalled at how early everything has been this year, I had forgotten NOW it REALLY IS time.

I could not buy my tree this early. I am damaged from a childhood incident, forever preventing me from buying a tree before Mid-December. I was 15 or 16 I believe. Maybe not even that old. We were traveling to The Great Omnipotent One's parent's home in Birmingham for Christmas. Grandaddy used to get so excited about our coming that he would start food shopping 3 months out. That Thanksgiving, he went out and bought a tree. He couldn't wait.

In the family room that great tree stood. I wouldn't be surprised if it was just hammered to 2 x 4's. I am sure it never received water. It does get cold in Birmingham and Granny was a wisp of a thing, probably standing all of 4'11 at the time and weighing barely 90 pounds... she was always cold. So the dry heat stayed on.. Grandaddy had those old fashioned Christmas lights, those big bulbs that put out some serious heat.

We arrived and saw this enormous.... dry... tree. You would walk by the tree and the air movement from you gait would send hundreds of dried pine needles to the floor. It wasn't carpeted, so you could hear them as they hit. Did I say that tree was dry? Dry, I tell you, it was dry. It was scary dry.

....It was SOOOOoooo dry, that Christmas morning came, we all huddled around the tree anxiously, it was time to turn the tree on. 1...2...3... the tree was turned on, everyone quickly said, "ooooohhh!' Ahhhhhh!" and you heard an adult in the back yell, "OK, Turn her off!" and 'plink' the lights went off as it was quicly unplugged from the socket. We were all afraid it was going to spontaneously combust.

When they dragged that tree out of the house, there was a trail of pine needles like I have never seen since. I am unsure there were any needles left on the tree when it was finally hauled to the backyard.

So if we do a live tree, I cannot buy it too early. I know, keep it watered... yeah, well, that might work, but I'm not trying it. Mid December works. And we have a fake one too.

He Thinks He Has Hamsterepathy

Son#3 thinks he can read Fiona's mind. Or at least that's how it comes across to me...

Little things like,

S3: Mom, mom, mom, mom, She needs to get out. I need to take her out and put her in her ball. (We have this little ball you put her in, close it shut and she can roll over the house.)

Me: She NEEDS to get out? How do you know this? Did she tell you?

S3: No, Mom, I can tell. Look at her. I just know. Trust me. We must let her out!

Heh. Me thinks there will be a jail break soon, aided by one of the guards, in particular the littlest guard.

There has also been discussion that I may actually have more affection towards this little rodent than my boys. Perhaps. How far I have come since my rat incident spanning 1 week last year... a topic I must blog on one day. Let's just say I accidentally fed a rat for 4 days while trying to trap it in my garage... it was trying to live in my car...

Pie...

Right about now I wish I'd made a chocolate pie for Thanksgiving. Not that anything is WRONG with apple or pumpkin, but there is just everything RIGHT with chocolate.... And the leftovers would be in MY house since I hostessed Thanksgiving. They would be in my refrigerator. They would be on my plate....

Next year... It's chocolate.

Princess Fiona

I don’t know what I’m thinking sometimes. I guess the thought was I don’t have enough input in my life with 3 kids, 1 husband, volunteer work at the school, volunteer work outside the school and a newly acquired job. So since I don’t have enough stimulation in my life, we added… a Hamster. Yes, we now have a pet, as of yesterday.

Every morning I have been awakened to “Mom, mom, mom, mom, can we get pets today?” If not awakened by, it surely was the immediate topic at breakfast and was repeated throughout the day, in particular by Son#3. If he doesn’t ask for a pet, he asks me to have another baby, and that factory is closed. No more babies in my house. In an absolute snit one day a couple weeks ago he yelled, “I am sick of being the littlest person in this house! Why couldn’t you have me first?!” Hence, I gather, the need for a pet… the need for something smaller than he in this house.

Yesterday I finally caved after giving thought and e-mailing Anita at Fighting Inertia. Having a Hamster for her boys, she was a treasure trove of knowledge. Off we set to the store in search of a ‘teddy bear’ hamster. They had one. We now own it. It’s a she, they promised me she is not pregnant, and she is brown.

Hunting for the name was a real delight. (sarcasm noted here)

The first name dropped by Son#3 was ‘Oreo’. Did I say this hamster is brown? I told him no, think again. Come to find out, the little girl next door has a black and white hamster named Oreo. So much for originality from Son#3.

Next name dropped by my youngest was… naming it after him. My only surprise there is that this was not his first choice since he seems to think that the solar system revolves around him ‘The Son’ and not ‘The Sun’. I told him, no, it’s a girl, we need a girl’s name.

Third name bandied about also pegged the origination meter… Brownie. Yeah, that wasn’t happening. I could see this rodent dying, our getting another brown hamster, naming it Brownie 2 and 30 years from now we’d be reminiscing about all the ‘Brownies’ we owned. Wasn’t going to happen.

Names are being thrown all over now, anything dealing with Harry Potter was brought up, with my eldest sitting strong on Unsu (pronounced oonsue), which is a black belt kata performed meaning 'cloud hands'. Cool thought, I liked the sound, but the younger two wanted nothing to do with it. ‘Teddy Bear’ was brought up. Beeeeenh, wrong answer. It was suggested I go on-line and look up the Japanese translation for both Hamster and Teddy Bear. That wasn’t happening.

Then someone came up with the name… Fiona. And it stuck. So we now have a very cute girl hamster named Fiona. And, yes, the stories have already started.

I was awakened this morning by Son#3. “Mom! We are making balls of stuff for Fiona to chew and putting it in her cage”, he said. “Really?”, I replied, “And what are you making this ball out of?” “Aluminum Foil”, was the answer, to which my husband bolted out of bed to save Fiona from her keepers. They now know, paper and cardboard only. No foil.

Carnival of the Recipes is UP!!!!

This week's hostess is Mary Beth of Random Thoughts from Mary Beth. Let me tell you folks, there is some great stuff over there. And let me also tell you a little story on one of those recipes...

I used to be single. Yeah, I haven't always been an old married lady. And I had this friend... who I will just call... VW. And I went to college with VW and her then husband and they got me to come down here to work. We palled around together. And sometimes... VW, who is an excellent cook... would take pity on me and would invite me over for dinner and I would break bread with she and her then husband. One night she served this awesome Chicken Tetrazzini recipe. Hmm. I'm thinking it was... oh... 16 or 17 years ago? (Ring a bell, VW?!) So over the years I've asked for said recipe because I enjoyed it so much that I can actually remember craving it. Have a received this recipe? NOOOOoooooo. It took the frickin' Carnival of the Recipes for me to get this damn recipe!

So now I will make it. And I don't know whether it was really really that good or if it was a case of my being a single career woman who at the time did not cook much, being fed a REAL meal by a married couple. Looking at the ingredients, I think it is really that good. But you never know... it could have been that home cooked meal thing! :)

Anyway, MaryBeth outdid herself and it is wonderful. There are some great looking recipes. I used recipes from last week's Carnival and they were SUPERB! So stop by and take a look. There is something for everyone.

And also, once again, thank you to the wonderful Beth for originating and running this great idea!

Movie Night with the Boys

We took the boys to see National Treasure. It is a very fun movie. We enjoyed it as a family.

Have you ever watched a movie and watched a character that reminds you of someone? I'm not talking just physical characterics, but the actual personality. In this movie, Nicholas Cage has a 'sidekick' named Riley. (It's a guy.) One of my co-workers at my last job before I got laid off was a personality clone of this character. I couldn't quit laughing throughout the movie. Before 'Riley' did anything, I knew in advance what his reaction would be scripted to be. It was the intonation and the deadpanning too. When you work side by side with someone for three years, you almost know them better than your spouse. This co-worker of mine used to crack me up. There was some great stuff going on in that guy's head. Watching the movie brought it back...

Funny stuff. Fun film.

The Truth 'Revealed'

I finally had the nerve to ask Son#3 why he pulled up 'Lisa who he kissed at the Lite Brite’s' skirt. I figured it was because he wanted to know if she was wearing Hulk underwear like him. Nope. That wasn’t it. This is the reply I received:

“No, Mom. Can you believe she wears just plain white underwear? (horror in his voice) I was expecting Hello, Kitty! She has a Hello, Kitty lunch box, Hello, Kitty backpack and her shoestrings have Hello, Kitty and so does the stuff she wears in her hair. I just wanted to see if her undies were Hello, Kitty too. And they’re not!”

I did speak to him about how he could not do that anymore. It’s not nice.

My Odd Day in Review

Yesterday was a most delightful Thanksgiving… but it was not without event or witnessing the absurd because after all, we are talking about me!

I got dressed and made my way out to the Jewish deli to pick up my Kosher Turkey. The people were wonderful and it was extraordinarily festive as I waited in line to get my bird. As I pick it up and I ask about heating instructions, I am told 1 hour, with a wet towel over it to keep it from drying out, at 300 degrees. Hmm. I’m in a bit of a panic as I have this timeline in my head as to when each dish goes into my oven and I had yet to plan for this 18 pound turkey. Fortunately for me, VW called me in my drive and the conversation went something like this… keep in mind, I keep my blog clean, but I do curse, more than I should. No, it is not ladylike. Yes, I realize it is a bad habit, and I am trying to curb it, really I am. But when I get stressed it is worse and VW is good about tolerating it and saying nothing.

Me: Can you efing believe it? I’ve got to find an hour in my timeline for this GD bird at 300 degrees. It’s not there. I swear, the time is not there!

VW: You need to put it in your grill. Warm it in your grill.

Me: What? My grill? There’s no way! This is a BIG damn bird. There is no efing way my grill is going to hold this turkey. NO.WAY!

VW: I promise you, use your grill.

So I did! And she was right! It worked. Of course I had to engineer it some, the pan was still too close to the flames and my bird and the juices were starting to cook as in Saute, not cook as in heat. I brought out my muffin tins, put them upside down to create a shelf, put a thermometer in there to keep track of the heat (I know, I know… I have number issues) and poured water on the towels every 10 minutes to keep it moist and it was the best turkey I have had in a long time.

However, in between this, I realized after I got home with said bird that I had forgotten… the gravy! Can you believe it? How many people forget GRAVY?! But I did and realizing I bought I precooked bird, it is not as if I could make my own with turkey drippings. Keys in hand and cursing under my breath, I trekked to Winn Dixie as Publix is closed on Thanksgiving. I believe I have said in the past, I live in the country. They built a Publix near me, but Winn Dixie is a haul. I had successfully just eliminated 1 hour of my preparation time, an hour I did not believe I had to spare.

I was wondering if Winn Dixie would even be open. Open? It.was.packed. I just assumed it was full of bone headed people like me who had forgotten a significant item. I decided to watch and see what types of things people had forgotten, to see if was anything was as stupid as forgetting gravy. The woman in front of me bought two items: flowers and dish washing soap. Phht. Talk about important. Can you imagine feeding the masses only to realize you didn’t have anything to clean your dishes? Another guy forgot dinner rolls. I could see that.

But overall, much to my surprise, Winn Dixie was NOT filled with absent minded professors! It was, in fact, filled with people doing their ENTIRE Thanksgiving Day shopping. It was filled with Procrastinators! Upon telling this story to someone, they said to me, “Well maybe they were just too busy working throughout the week…” No. We know in advance when T-day is… Now I fully realize that some people didn’t shop because they did not have the money until that day to do so, but I assure you, that was not the average person in that store. I was very surprised and then quietly patted myself on the back that even though I didn’t have my table set 2 weeks in advance like many of my girlfriends or my Mother, the fact I had shopped, created a time line and started preparing in advance, even if it was just the night before, was still far better than some.

So here I am in panic mode as dinner is to start at 1:30 per my request and I'm running a bit behind. What was I thinking? My husband’s family has issues with ‘timeliness’, as in they have a difficult time arriving to family functions on time. They manage to make it to work. They manage to make it to church. But when it comes to family dinners, 30 minutes to an hour late is the norm. And quite frankly, I find it offensive and insulting. By being that late, consistently, sends the message to me that my time is not as important as theirs. That coming to my home and having dinner is low priority to what they are doing. I find it irritating and yesterday it happened again. And yesterday, I vented horribly about it before they arrived. I was the picture of cool civility when they did waltz through my door… something very obvious so they stayed away until I could find it in my heart to be warm and festive to the boorish clods.

I said to my husband after he hung up from the phone call informing us they would be at least 30 minutes late, “Do I not have a right to be angry over this? For 16 years they arrive late. I am so sick of it.”

He replied, “I’m not saying you do or do not have a right, only that is it really that big a deal in the big scheme of things?”

My retort was, “It is if they ruin my potatoes and stuffing!!!!”

Yes, my dinner was ready on time... even though they were not here and even though I lost an hour going to get gravy.

I could not figure out why I do not plan for their socially unacceptable tardiness. After overanalyzing it for hours yesterday it finally occurred to me. It is not that I am the eternal optimist (far from it) expecting that, ‘YES, THIS will be the day they FINALLY show up on time’, but rather, it is ingrained in me to be punctual, it is a part of my being, so I cannot plan for someone’s vast inconsiderate nature when it is not something I could fathom in myself. One day they will push too far, but for now I keep it in check as it is my husband’s brother. (His sister is worse. Figure no less than an hour late. It is truly appalling.)

After dinner, when family had finally left, my boys were outside playing baseball with their father when my neighbor’s daughters came over to play too. I just looked at the Mom and said, “Would you like to go for a walk?” and next thing I knew, we had running shoes on and were walking a good clip for 5 miles. What a great end to a big meal! So I promptly sat down after our walk and ate 2 more pieces of pumpkin pie!

It was a great day!

Giving Thanks

Today I’m thankful for the usual. I’m thankful for my family and friends, our health, and the good year we have had. I’m thankful we made it through some pretty tough times in September and October, getting through unscathed when considering the potential of the bad that could have occurred. But that is not what I’m thinking of today, well I am, but not the foremost thought.

Today I am thankful for our troops. We have troops scattered throughout the world and we have some at war for us… for this country… for my family… for me. Today there are young men and women in the Middle East that are standing up for us and defending us against an enemy that would seek to take all that we know.

Today as I gather with my family in the safety of my home, there are men and women away from their families, missing their loved ones. There are men and women afraid as they fight for what is right… for us… for me.

Every day someone dies for us… someone dies for me. Today will be no different. Today as we sit around our table celebrating Thanksgiving, there will be someone who dies for my freedom. And I am speechless as to what I could possibly say to their families…it would all sound so hollow.

So today as I pray my prayer of Thanksgiving, I send special prayers to our troops and to their families. I pray for their safety and for their homecoming. And I humbly thank them in prayer.

To them I say, Thank You and May God Bless.

Happy Thanksgiving.

More about my Turkey Post

I posted yesterday about how I am buying my Turkey pre-cooked. I'm going to be really peeved if I find out I have to heat that sucker for 90 minutes, per what Stu said. I don't have room for that! I got a 17 pounder! Geez!

And then my loyal reader George pointed out that next time I want to brine a turkey to let him know as I should have used garbage bags and ice and cooler (look in the comments for the how to's). All I have to say is, "Why do I have such a hard time thinking OUT OF THE BOX sometimes?" I am such a follow the rules kind of girl sometimes... geez, you'd think I was the oldest child of a military household or something whacked like that. The directions said, "BUCKET" so there was NO WAY I would think of "BAG". (Yes, it can be scary being married to me.)

I was really wigging about this Turkey germ thing. The FDA would be very proud that this whole salmonella thing took with me many moons ago. I'm a freak about poultry germs. So when I had my buckets filled with big butt turkeys and water and ice, I broke out our boat cooler and tried to get them to set in it... and they didn't fit. (Looking back, I can't believe I was able to lift them and didn't pull something... must've been all that 'lift with the legs, not with the back' training.) It wasn't for lack of trying to think out of the box that I did not... I just never thought of using a plastic bag INSTEAD of a bucket.

So after I get a better oven, I may actually try this whole turkey cooking thing again. I may. I still have a big box of Kosher salt, and I should use it for something...

There are Some Days When....

Nothing goes seriously wrong, but a lot goes seriously not quite right.

Luckily I was trained well by my folks that when I have butt loads of people coming for dinner, you start preparing way in advance. My Mom starts weeks in advance... the lessons didn't take so well on me, I start the night before, but hey, at least I'm not a huge procrastinator. Like my Dad, I do my baking in advance. I went shopping last night (Tuesday night) so as to not be at Publix with thousands of people today (Wednesday).

I'm so glad I bake the day before. I break open my can of pumpkin I had in my pantry and I set out my Sweetened Condensed milk. As I open the pumpkin I notice this tiny little detail I did not notice before... Pumpkin has an expiration date and mine was two YEARS past. Sure enough, that can had nothing in it I wanted to bake with. Now I knew I had to go to Publix. I looked at my can of Sweetened Condensed milk and thought, "Uh oh. If my Pumpkin has been in there two years, how long has this been in there?" I opened it and the milk was orange.

So I did what I always do when faced with a cooking dilemma. I called my folks. The Great Omnipotent One answered. I said, "Dad, what color is sweetened condensed milk supposed to be?" to which he replied, "Cream color... kind of off white... why?" I said, "Are you sure it's not supposed to be orange?" and he said, "No. Cream color." Hmm. That settled that. I was for sure going to Publix now.

I finished baking the Pumpkin pie with new ingredients and started on the Apple pie, which called for light corn syrup. I KNEW, I JUST KNEW I had some of that, but it flat out disappeared when I went to get it. All I had was dark. So what did I do? I called home.

"Dad, what is the difference between dark and light corn syrup?"
"Nothing."
"Are you sure? I mean why would they have NO difference other than color. It sounds kind of dumb. There isn't any taste difference?"
"Nope, just the color" and then he explains about dark pies and light pies and I ALMOST SAID,"Wait, let me talk to Mom", but then I realized, "Ummm, Dad is the one who does the baking. He would KNOW this."

So I used the dark and he was right, as he knew he was, and it is just a darker pie.

Within minutes I gather my sister called. My Mom answered and told him he needed to come to the phone. His reply was, "Which daughter is this? The Apple Pie or the Sweet Potato Pie?"

Heh. Evidently we were tag teaming the baking questions today.

Then on my way to Karate today, I had to stop for gas as the traffic here in Palm Beach County is SOOOO bad, they are saying it has NEVER been this bad other than hurricane evacuation. Every major road is torn up for construction and there were wrecks littering the highway. My husband had a buddy from Miami come up for lunch today and on his way home, it took what is normally a 1.5 hour drive, 4.5 hours.

Anyway, so I stopped for gas for fear I would get stuck in some hellish jam and they were out of everything but Premium. I guess everyone is driving somewhere and they were all filling up. My issue was Premium here costs me $2.33 a gallon. Holy crap, Lions tours. I didn't even want to look at the receipt.

The Devil Inside...

I can't get that song out of my head. Thanks, Jim! (shaking my fist towards Georgia...) Now I'm going to end up buying that INXS CD, which I've been meaning to do anyway.... Bah!

I'm Too Neurotic to Cook a Turkey

OK, OK! I'm going to admit it. I'm NOT cooking my own turkey this year. I 'm buying it pre-cooked... from a restaurant... and picking it up Thanksgiving Day morning...

I know, the travesty. I have surely let all my readers down, in particular any of my male readers who must surely picture me barefoot in the kitchen! LOL! They're probably thinking, "Oh, she goes and gets a job and look at that uppity girl go! Now she won't even cook her own dadbern turkey!" Heh.

Well, there is kind of a story and a reason. First, Thanksgiving is at my house. I'm doin' it all folks, except for a green bean casserole and a salad someone is bringing. The rest of it, other than the Eggplant Parmesan my husband is cooking, is falling squarely upon these shoulders. No big deal. Women have been doing this for years... but here's the deal. My oven isn't big enough to cook all the food I have laid out on my timeline along with a turkey (I desparately need a double oven or a small convection oven or something) and my oven doesn't heat evenly. And the last Thanksgiving I did here was nearly a disaster.

My cousin is a phenomenal cook. He watches all the cooking shows. He is such a cooking addict that if you hum the theme song from ANY cooking show on TV, his young toddler girl could tell you what show it's from. Well a couple years ago, he imparted upon me this wonderful Turkey recipe that included soaking the bird in a brine solution.

I had beaucoup people coming over so I bought two birds. Then I went to Home Depot and bought these big damn buckets to soak these turkeys in. The birds have to soak over night. Let me remind you... I live in Florida. South Florida to be exact. I believe it was probably 90 degrees here yesterday and I feel certain that on Thanksgiving Day, it will be... you guessed it... 90 degrees again.

It is the day to start brining and I call my cousin and say something like, "Dude, where do I store these buckets with turkeys overnight? I'm getting kinda skeeved out at the thought of turkeys sitting OUT all night, not cool" to which he says something like, "Oh, I just stick them on my back porch, making sure I keep a board over them with a brick so animals don't get into it."

Whaaaa?

Yeah, you can do that if you live in the great white north, although your damn turkey will probably refreeze, but you can't be doin' that stick your turkey outside stuff in S. FL. Hell, it's cooler in my daggum house than it is outside in November!

So I say, "I can't do that!" and he says something like, "Well, when I lived in OH, I used to put it in my basement, that kept it cool."

Whaaaa?

We don't have basements here. Take a shovel in my backyard, dig two feet, and you hit water. There are no 'basements' in S. Fl.

Finally he says, "I think you're worrying too much, hun, the brine solution is half ice. You'll be fine."

Well, I was wigging anyway, picturing food poisoning in my house, which did happen to my sister in law one Christmas... when we were fortunately not there... and I was on the outs with her... so I laughed inwardly... and I know that karma is going to swing around one day and bite me in the arse. I just didn't want it to be that Thanksgiving! (Or really any. I am hoping I have made up with the Karmic Gods and all is forgiven.)

So all night I could not sleep. I'm picturing germs in my turkeys and so I kept waking up, going to the kitchen and adding ice to my turkeys. I worried needlessly. When it came time to take them out, those 'babies were turn your hands purple' cold!

That wasn't my worst problem.

Never having cooked a turkey, I went out and bought this stupid meat thermometer that runs on batteries. Have you noticed when reading my blog that I tend to not do anything in a small way? Yeah. Well, same thing here with these damn turkeys. I've got them 'plugged in' and now I'm a freak about watching the temperature (what can I say... I have issues with numbers) and I realize that my oven does not heat evenly nor does it maintain a good constant temperature. It's fluctuating here and there. I'm now completely freaked because I'm wondering about heat displacment in my oven... something like this:

"When cooking two turkeys, do you cook them as one big turkey? Take the pounds, add them together and then do 15 minutes per pound? Or do you assume that it will cook faster than two turkeys? And what about heat displacement? You now have two turkeys taking up all that heat, instead of one, so will it in fact make them cook slower..." and on and on and on... and I was on the internet and I was a mess.

It didn't matter the answer, evidently so irrelevant that I don't even remember it, the fact is, my oven wasn't cooking properly and those damn turkeys took forever and a half. Finally after what was literally hours and hours and everyone had eaten the appetizers, I pulled those suckers out. Upon cutting them, the legs were still not 100% done.

I spent all night worrying about the 'bad turkey karma' coming to get me. It didn't happen. Thankfully.

So I am buying my turkey, precooked and ready for me to pick up. And with my new job, yes, I am buying a new oven.

A Very Funny List

Via Contagion of the website Spoon and Blade, comes a very funny list called, "You Might be a Re-enactor if..."

You need not be a re-enactor to laugh at this list. I'm not one and I was chuckling. Then again... I know a bagpiper or two this could apply to... (whistling and looking up in the air...)

...you will pay $80.00 for a linen hunting shirt, but refuse to squeeze out $12.99 for a half-decent oxford at Wally World.

...You see someone you've known for years and don't recognize them in modern clothing.

...you've worn wool even when the temperature tops 100 degrees.

Good Stuff. Good for a light laugh!

Food Habits

From Stu over at Contemplation, he has these questions. Instead of posting them in his comments, I thought I would do the whole linky thing. He said Thanksgiving made him wonder about people'’s eating habits, how and what they eat. So here it goes:

1. Do you eat all of the food on your plate equally, or do you eat section by section, i.e. all the meats first, then the vegetables etc? I eat it all equally. A little bit of this, and a little bit of that, but I don'’t put different foods in my mouth at the same time unless we’re talking potatoes and meat. Those blend. All others must be eaten alone.

2. White or dark? Dark, please.

3. How do you get Pringles out of a can? Pour them out or stick your hand in the can? Pour 5 or 6 out in my hand. Repeat. Over and over. Until can is empty.

4. How do you eat a stick of gum. Do you fold it in, or do you put the entire stick in all at once? I don’'t eat sticks of gum. If I chew gum, I chew bubble gum and it is Bubblicious when I do. I have this thing about blowing bubbles...

5. What hand do you hold your knife and fork? Left hand fork, right hand knife.

6. How long does it take your family to eat Thanksgiving or Christmas dinner? If we'’re talking about my WASPY Celtic family, I'’ll say 1-1.5 hours. If we'’re talking my husband'’s Italian family and everyone is there... I think 5-6 hours. Or maybe it just feels like 5 or 6 hours. Maybe it’s really only 2 or 3. Either way, it’s a long damn time. Next question is... when with his very loud and demonstrative family, how much talking do I really do? Exactly... None. Sometimes I get a shout in here or there, but overall, I'’m the proverbial sponge, soaking it all in and remembering where I last put the Advil...

7. Do you put gravy on your mashed potatoes? Blech. No. I'’m a butter kinda gal.

8. Do you prefer canned or fresh cranberry sauce? I hate all cranberry sauce. Big Blech.

9. What do you usually drink with a regular dinner? What do you drink with Thanksgiving or Christmas dinner? Water only with regular dinner. Water at Thanksgiving and Christmas too. All other adults usually have wine with their dinner, but I’m just boring and plain and evidently have an immature palette. Water for me.

10. Turkey, Ham, or other main course for Thanksgiving or Christmas dinner? This has to be categorized by family.
His Family Thanksgiving: Yes. All of it. Turkey, Ham, Lasagna, Eggplant Parm
My Family Thanksgiving: Turkey. Very ‘traditional’.
His Family Christmas: Big ass Christmas Eve dinner with 5 courses and no meat... a Catholic thing... they eat fish and some seafoody white sauce (gravy) with spaghetti (macaroni)... usually a calamari gravy. Christmas Day: Yes. All of it. Turkey, Ham, lasagna and then 4 other courses. It truly is disgusting.
Christmas my family: Ham with Cheese grits and then all the fixin’s.

How about you?

Follow the Bouncing Ball...

Once again, a story that I think the men will laugh at, I may gather a cyber collective *gasp* from the women... and my Mom might get kinda pissed. Just a little... although she may laugh and *gasp*.

Background: Keep in mind my Son is 9 and really just is NOT noticing anything. Also, remember that his mother is a small breasted woman. When I go running if I wear a good tight sports bra, I look like a boy. There is no 'bouncing'.

We were eating dinner after going to see the Sponge Bob movie. The topic of David Hasselhoff came up and Son#1 wanted to know who he was. So my husband explained that he was in a show called Knight Rider and then went on to be in a show called Baywatch where he played a life guard with a bunch of bikini clad women life guards who ran around on the beach. The following is the ensuing conversation:

Son#1: Sounds like a stupid show.

Husband: Maybe, but some men thought it brilliant.

Son#1: Why?

Husband: All the women in their bathing suits running on the beach. Their breasts were bouncing and some men like to watch that.

Son#1: (short thoughtful pause) Maybe they were attached by strings making them bounce up and down.

Silence at the table as my husband and I look at him.

Me: Yeeeaaaaah. That would do it.

I wasn't about to explain that to him... not anymore than I was about to explain that humans don't always do it like Donkeys.

First Day Rocked!

Ack! So much to say! So little time!

First, let me start with the badge picture. OMG. It looks horrible. The ONLY redeeming quality it has is that my name is in 1/2 inch letters under my picture, completely detracting from the picture itself. And to make it WORSE!, the evil mean security 'lady' said to me after she got my badge together, "Oh. Aren't you lucky. You got a good picture." I looked at it and almost screamed! It is SO bad, that when I picked up my kids from school, they looked at the picture and said, "Who is that? (pause) Is that supposed to be you?" Oh well.

Security is very tight at my new job. I got a 10 minute lecture on just how to badge in and out and what happens if I mess it up and what happens if I'm a frequent offender and all the more secured places in the building and you can only use this printer for this system or that printer from that system and never should the systems ever meet and on and on and on...

I passed my one background investigation but am now in the process of yet another. Who knows when I'll be able to officially get on all their systems. I was hoping for tomorrow, but I'll be lucky if it's Monday.

I didn't post on this, but I meant to. My buddy, K., said to me, "I'm a little worried for you as some of this work we have is so mundane and I know you and so I'm trying to put some good stuff in there." I replied, "Pulease. I drive a van 4 hours a day. How much more mundane can you get than that?" Then I realized... when I'm in my van, I listen to CDs or my Alternative Rock the whole time.

You have to understand, in my old job it was what we would call a bullpen... 100 engineers in one room, desk after desk after desk and not a note of music. Music was strictly forbidden. NONE. EVER. So then I thought, "Holy Crap, Lions Tours! I'm going to be doing some of this mundane work with NO MUSIC!"

So I said to him on Friday, "K, this is my only concern. When I'm bored at least I get to listen to music" and he said, "Oh. You're allowed to listen to music here. Just bring a headset..."

Whaaa?!! I nearly flipped out. What a great job! I get to work WITH MUSIC! My sister thinks I'm a nut and she keeps saying, "I think you used to work in a prison. Everyone has music in their work place." But I didn't! But now I do!! Yippee!!!

Here's the kicker though. I'm over my head right now. I am learning all new systems and I don't know this particular product. I'm pulling blue prints, taking system notes and trying to jog my memory from a similar product. (K. keeps telling me all this stuff is in my dormant memory and it will come back. I don't have the heart to tell him otherwise.) So there will be no listening to music until I have my feet firmly planted, and I can go through these systems in my sleep. I give it 2 weeks.

The toughest part for me is going to be... not working more than the 10-15 hours I have scheduled. Today was everything I hoped it would be... and then some!

The Big Day

Tomorrow is the first day of work. Wow. I'm finishing out some paperwork tonight, packing my lunch, and then trying to figure out what I'm going to wear.

I know, you men are thinking, "Typical woman, worrying about what she's going to wear", but it's not like that! I am a woman who wore one black shoe and one blue shoe to work and never noticed until lunchtime. Luckily I work with engineers who didn't notice either.... Phew. But tomorrow it's a big deal... because... I'M GETTING MY PICTURE TAKEN FOR MY BADGE! Argh! This picture has to last with me for as long as I'm employed there and I don't want it to look like a mug shot nor do I want to look like a total dork.... nor do I want to look like death warmed over. So I'm a little worried about what I'm wearing.

I got a call on Friday from my girlfriend who submitted my name. She was so excited. She was carrying on about how fun this is going to be. I was saying it was deja vu as she'll be training me as she trained me in February 1988 when I started my first job. She told me they gave me this sh1t hot computer, better than hers... Hmm.

So then I got a call from my buddy who hired me. K. and I carpooled and hung out all the time when we were both young engineers. He came to my wedding. My husband and I traveled to Chicago for his. (My only trip to Chicago and I was impressed with the cleanliness of that city.) And when I answer the phone, he is giddy and I start to laugh. He says, "Can you frickin' believe it! Its going to be like it was! You and me! I am so excited. We're going to get so much accomplished... and we got your computer set up and they're setting up your phone..." and he went on and on. I could not quit laughing at him. Finally I said, "K., I hear my computer is top of the line, nicer than yours" and he replied that it was. I was quiet and finally said, "You should switch them out. I am only part time. You take the good one. I have no ego in this job anymore. You're full time, I'll take the low end computer." And... he said... no.

It sounds silly to you, I'm sure, reading this. I was laid off 4 years ago when they closed our plant and I went through a very dark time. I felt worthless, unappreciated, as if all I had done mattered for naught. The hours, the sweat, the fighting for what was right, all of it... seemed completely worthless and therefore, I must've been too.

And now, here it is 4 years later, and my friends are calling me back and it is in a sense, a small bit of validation that I did make some small impact... enough that someone somewhere would want me back. But it is different now. I will give my friend 200% as I did before... for the hours that I am there. But no longer will my ego, no longer will ME be wrapped up in my job. I've been there, done that, and I got burned.

I am excited for tomorrow. It is like the first day of school. Sleeping will be tough. I'll be going over all of it in my head. My stomach has butterflies.

And a BIG thank you to all of those who have e-mailed, commented, and even put a sentence or two in your blogs referencing your happiness and positive thoughts my way. None of it has been unnoticed and I am grateful.

Unintentional Good Deeds

Eric of Straight White Guy is back from his trip to Scotland and something he wrote tugged a string in my heart. Let me first say I love the way Eric writes and how he is able to convey via words the world he sees around him, his experiences as well as his perceptions. He is funny as hell. The post I reference at the end of this post... the section I am referring to, is located 2/3 of the way down his post, but the entire post is well worth the read... as they always are.

My Mother in Law died unexpectedly 5 years ago. I’ll post on it more as the anniversary of her death comes, but for now, let me just say it threw us all and coping for the first couple years was difficult at best. Last year I was at Son#3’s pre-school when a Mom I didn’t know came up to me and said something like, “Someone just told me your last name is ‘last name here’ and I was wondering if you were any relation to ‘M-I-L’s name here’.”

My last name is very uncommon. If you hear it once, it sticks. So I told her that yes I was, that she was in fact my Mother in Law.

The Mom then said to me, “I loved your Mother in Law. When my daughter was born (this would be the child that is Son#3’s age and is now even in his kindergarten class) she was born with a severe liver problem and had to undergo a liver transplant. (The mother donated part of her own liver to save her daughter’s life.) Your Mother in Law brought us meals and she was so wonderful to us. When I told her once in church how much I enjoyed one of her dishes, she showed up the next day with a fresh batch of it for us. I was so sad when she died and I just wanted to tell you how much I still think of her and how sorry I am for your loss.”

I almost started to cry. It had been just short of 4 years and yet someone remembered her. Someone other than family. And they took the time to tell me. And to relate their story. And it made me feel warm inside that she did touch this world and even if it was one other person outside of the family, someone remembered. I see this Mom at our new school now and a layer of warmth envelopes me every time. Her daughter is one of the girls that loves to tuck her hand inside mine and walk with me when I assist in PE on Friday mornings. I look at the girl as a miracle child and I look at the Mom as a messenger of great love.

So when I saw Eric’s post HERE and how he is in awe that here he was sitting at a bar in the frickin’ Newark airport and actually met Ira Hayes’ nephew, I think perhaps on the other side, the nephew was warmed by the fact that here HE was, schlepping through the Newark airport and some YOUNG guy he met actually REMEMBERED his uncle, and Eric more than remembered, he knew about his uncle. And I have to believe, that when Mr. Hayes' nephew boarded his plane, there was a warmth in his heart that a young stranger remembered. His uncle was not forgotten.

A Vice.. I guess...

I don’t watch a lot of TV. It’s not a snob thing. I just LOVE to read. I’ll read anything. If I’m at breakfast and the newspaper isn’t here, I’ll read the cereal box. I read constantly. All the time. It may be a curse, but I think it is more of an escape.

My kids, they read, but since they are young, not as much. They play outside, on the computer, game boys, and the such, but also they have a thing about cartoons, two of which I have grown to really like. I have to admit it, but I love to watch Samurai Jack and Sponge Bob Squarepants comes in 2nd. This is the closest I can come to Pop Culture. I am a person who had NO clue who Dr. Phil was until 18 months ago and I have never seen one episode of American Idol. But Samurai Jack? I’ll stop what I’m doing to watch him. Sponge Bob? I will watch and fold laundry. I cannot wait to own Samurai Jack’s first season on DVD and just this morning I was watching my favorite episode of Sponge Bob, the one where he sets up a Bubble Stand and gives ‘bubble blowing lessons’. “Take it AROUNNNDD TOWWWWN!” It cracks me up.

A couple months ago I was riding with a friend and her Mom to some woman’s function. I made some stupid reference about Sponge Bob and my friend started to laugh. Her Mom, who is in her late 70's was clueless. If you watch Sponge Bob, have you ever tried to describe it to someone? We were trying to describe this silly cartoon and it went something like this:

It’s about a sponge… who lives under the sea… he is square and his pants are square… he is naïve and perpetually optimistic… like a three year old. His best friend is a pink star fish… named Patrick… who wears Hawaiian pants… and he’s not very bright… actually he’s stupid…. A stupid pink starfish… that talks. And they live next door to a Squid… names Squidward… who plays the clarinet… and did we say that Sponge Bob lives in a Pineapple?... and Sponge Bob loves Squidward, but Squidward hates Sponge Bob. And they work at a restaurant called the Krusty Krab… run by a lobster looking crab man… named Mr. Krabbs… and they make sandwiches called… Krabby patties… and Mr. Krabbs is a cheap Scotsman with a Scottish broque… And Sponge Bob has another friend… a squirrel named Sandy, who has to wear deep sea diving equipment because... she’s a squirrel and can’t live under water… and she’s really smart… and from Texas… and his arch nemesis is Plankton... who owns the Chum Bucket...and he wants to rule the world...

It just got more and more ridiculous. I have to say, I felt so stupid, but it made the entire car laugh as we talked about the absurdity. Who woulda thunk it? A stupid cartoon about a sponge living in a pineapple under the sea would become so popular? And me, "Mrs. I don’t do Pop Culture", knows every episode…

So today we took the kids to see Sponge Bob. I thought it funny and lived up to the silly and ridiculous of the show. My husband did not laugh, thinking it pretty inane, as I’m sure the average adult feels the same. I’m not sure why I like the show… I think it is the naïve optimism of that stupid little sponge.

It Never Ceases to Amaze Me...

...how well I can see when I actually bother to wear my glasses.

Heh.

Carnival of the Pajamas

Another Carnival... but I'm not hosting this one. This is Harvey's Carnival of the Pajamas. So far I've posted all my real blogging attire HERE and HERE. Then last Carnival, I posted what I could wear blogging for Halloween.

This week... you get what my 5 year old thinks I look like when blogging... i.e. what Son#3 thinks I look like. He was watching the movie Hulk when he said to his Dad, "Look! It's Mom!" I love that kid... but obviously he is NOT a detail person. He focuses on the blue eyes, white skin, dark hair... and it must be Mom. Go figure.

14th Carnival of the Recipes

I'm the hostess with the mostess this week!!! Yahoo!! Guess what it means to be the hostess? It means I get to preview EVERYTHING. Holy Cow. If you can put on weight by looking at recipes, I've got some serious issues... And boy, talk about reading. I've been having a great time perusing everyone's blog. Not only are there some great recipes here, but if you look at their blogs, we have some interesting chefs.

I've done the best I can here, folks, so any errors I have made in spelling, grammar, punctuation, etc..., my apologies up front. I will blame it on the food fantasies getting in the way of my typing...

I'm going to break this down like the authors of my favorite cookbook (Some Like it South) did:

APPETIZERS

From Jeff of Trub. The sediment of life we have a Cheesy Beer Dip. He talks about it being good at work get togethers, but I saw football game food written all over it. He has another great recipe I listed under Soups and Salads... great for big gatherings.

You're going to see this blog in a couple spots here since I divided this up like a cookbook and they supplied us with a plethora of yummy recipes. From Booklore are a few Appetizer recipes to take a gander at, ranging from cheese balls to vegetable platters. Booklore makes a good point that many people skip breakfast on Thanksgiving so Appetizers are a great idea.

The Lovely SarahK of Moutaineer Musings supplies us with Spinach Dip. And SarahK, after my own heart, talks about football... She says that you should put the dip in the fridge, then watch the Cowboys play some, then... well there is more as only SarahK can provide. You gotta go there and read it... Here's to hoping I don't end up with any female relatives over at my house telling me I'm fat... I think that could be the kiss of death for someone!

OK, leave it to Helen of Every Day Stranger, a wonderfully witty blogger, to stump me on where to put this one. Appetizer? Vegetable? Breads? My Southern Cookbook doesn't have tarts! Ack! So I put it here and hopefully I am correct. Goat's Cheese and Red Onion Tart is located at the bottom of her post in her extended entry. This looks... delightful!

BEVERAGES

Countertop at The Countertop Chronicles has... something toasty for the holidays! Mike's Kahlua Coffee Liquor. YUM!

From Dan at Dan K. O'Leary.com we have "Drunk On Thanksgiving". Talk about a lot of kick. Take a look, anything with Irish Whiskey in it is something to seriously give thought to...

SOUPS and SALADS

John of Brown Hound sends us a phenomenal sounding recipe for Fiesta Chowder, which he suggests to serve with cornbread. As he puts it 'now that it's getting cold...' and he is right. It looks like a great soup to both keep you warm and full. Army/Navy football game is approaching... should be cold... I have football food on the brain...

From Booklore we have two other recipes, Ambrosia Salad. I know on my side of the family, we never have a picnic or big family get together without an Ambrosia Salad. Also, there is Bernadette's Perfect Cranberry Sauce For Those Who Think They Hate It... just in time for the big meal Next Thursday!

My wonderfully supportive blog brother, That1Guy of Drunken Wisdom, submits Cranberry Applesauce. He says this is a very easy recipe, even if inebriated... but he has a word of warning in the event you are drinking and cooking...

The Ministry of the Minor Perfidy has provided us with a grunch of recipes!!! Wow. We could do an entire cookbook just from their submittals! First we have from Johno, The Filthy Imperialist's Carrot Soup, which he says is quick and spicy and great with grilled cheese. More to follow in other portions of this post...

Caltechgirl from Not Exactly Rocket Science (I love the name of her blog), provides us with TWO for the price of one in the same post! I'm categorizing them here as there is an Easy Cranberry Sauce (scroll down a piece in her post)... and I wasn't sure where to put her Sausage, Apple, and Cranberry Stuffing. (My cookbook didn't have stuffing... Grains? Vegetable? Wasn't sure.) I've been looking for a good stuffing recipe as Turkey day is here and she was good enough to send this to me... Looks Wonderful!

Angela of Fresh as a Daisy gives us Slow-Cooker Vegetable Soup. I'm all about slow cooker recipes and this one looks great. I see this as good cold weather fare as well as football food... there's that word again... football...

Jeff of Trub. The sediment of life, posts Memphis Style Coleslaw. He says there is never any left when he makes this for a large group. It may not be Thanksgiving food, but I foresee a lot of large group gatherings between now and the end of the year.

ENTREES

Beef

I was debating where to put this one... I was thinking appetizer or soup, but according to my cookbook, it goes under Beef. So... Jim, of Snooze Button Dreams, has provided us with Jim's Death Chili (aka, Jim's Chili of Anal Destruction). He has submitted this before in Sgt. Hook's Chili cook-off, so I think that in itself lends credence to it. (Sorry no link to the cook off... the link doesn't work anymore.) Jim cracks me up. Every time I read his blog... including this recipe. Great stuff.

Kari of Dogwood Dreams submits Holtz Spaghetti. Her blog made me laugh out loud, "There are XX days til Christmas, Crochet faster!" Phew. No pressure there! I know, you won't believe this, but this is a good Thanksgiving recipe too. I'm married into an Italian family and we ALWAYS have a pasta dish on the side. ALWAYS!!!

Where in the world was Laughing Wolf during Soccer Season?! I needed this recipe!! Linda's Cube Steak. As a person ON.THE.GO, all day long, I LOVE these recipes that get to simmer all day long. I have a feeling this has officially made my monthly rotation of recipes. Thank you, LW!

From Buckethead of The Ministry of the Minor Perfidy, we have Chili con Buckethead. (I don't make up the names folks...) Seriously, this guy sounds like an engineer. He talks of finding the ultimate chili recipe by recording successes and failures in their quest. They built a database... and 2 1/2 months later... Voila. Check it out. Cracks me up. (He says you need beer and toilet paper on hand... you really gotta read this post...)

El Capitan of Baboon Pirates posts Chili Dog Casserole. He says it feeds 8 regular people, 4 hungry people, or 2 Texas boys. Me thinks he must be from Texas. *grin* Oh... whataya know... that's what it says in his profile! Daggum it sounds good, but he is right, I may need bypass surgery after. I'm chalkin' this one up to Football Food! Again!

Seafood

From Christina at Fiesty Repartee we have Drunken Crawfish Pie. This sounds WONDERFUL! And she even talks about how to substitute crabmeat and shrimp for crawfish... a detail oriented woman. I love it!

Allan of Inside Allan's Mind is Margarita Salmon. My husband and I have been talking about eating more fish and this looks like a recipe that assists in that endeavor. The recipe even comes complete with grilling warnings! He also has tips with regard to the marinade... almost made me wonder if I should file this under beverages...

Songstress7 of News from the Great Beyond provides us with Salmon Croquettes, or as she also puts it, "Salmon Patties for the Non-Frenchified among you..." Yeah. That would be me. *grin* They sound VERY tasty and will be going into my new Seafood Recipe Rolodex.

Johno of The Ministry of Minor Perfidy didn't let me down! Oooohhhh nooooo... in all of the great recipes they sent, they included a recipe for St. Peter's Italian Cod which should definitely help me on my quest to eating more fish... Fish... Italian... I think this may be our Christmas Eve fish recipe in the House of Boudicca.

Ohhhh and he did it again! We have 'The Fish' and this one even has Wasabi as an option! Youch! Johno provides a list of fish you can use. Most excellent.

Poultry

Kinayda of Kin's Kouch posts Chicken Fried Rice. We love Asian food in this house and I have not quite gotten the Fried Rice thing down yet. This recipe is officially on my list to try. While studying this, I think I see what I've been doing wrong...

The Glittering Eye provides us with the Main Meal for The Big Day! Here we have Smoked Turkey and Dressing. This turkey soaks in a brine... it may sound like a lot of work, but it's not and I've had a brined turkey, and trust me, they are awesome!

Bothenook of A Geezer's Corner also agrees and supplies us with his Brine Recipe as well as directions for how to smoke it with Smoking a Turkey. There is a lot of good and witty commentary here on the whys and hows...

Punctilious of Like News but Tasty submits Spicy Grilled Turkey. This sounds easy and yummy. The e-mail with this link was a riot. The bird is being grilled as the oven 'is the size of a dinosaur brain'. That had me laughing. I'm thinking they're on the right track potentially serving it with salsa and tortilla chips instead of peeling potatoes... (Hmmm....less work...)

VEGETABLES

Cindy of Notes in the Key of Life posted Shoe-Peg Corn Casserole, a casserole that looks both easy AND great for Thanksgiving!

Eric of What is Flig? provides us with a recipe for Mashed Potatoes (Parve). He adds that, "Parve means that there are neither meat nor dairy ingredients, and it may be served at a kosher meal of either type." I was just posting on worrying about cooking for some friends of mine that keep Kosher and I will be keeping this recipe handy... if I don't use it for Thanksgiving!

Alison of AliThinks provides two recipes, one I listed under breads and this one called Leaves of the Grape. Stuffed Grape Leaves. She says it's a good weekend recipe because although it is easy, it does take some time. She even has picture illustrations!!! Wow. Talk about thorough!

I am putting triticale-the wheat/rye guy's recipe here, but honestly, this is a main course. Called Tarte Cote D'Azur (An Italian Pie), it won at the 1988 Texas State Fair. I can't do this 'pie' justice with words. Go take a look. He never submits anything other than top notch. Never.

Pammy of Lollygaggin' posts Herby Twice Baked Potatoes. Yikes! Is anything better with a steak than twice baked potatoes? They sound awesome, but then she talks about adding crumbled bacon... and they sound decadent...

Jo Ann Courtney sends this Asparagus Casserole that I think also sounds like a great accompaniment to Thanksgiving:

Mrs. Morse's Asparagus Casserole

1 cup crushed Ritz crackers
2 (14 1/2 oz.) cans cut green asparagus, drained
1 cup grated sharp cheese
1/4 cup butter, diced
1 cup blanched almonds, toasted and finely ground
1 cup milk

Line a casserole dish with a few cracker crumbs. Alternate layers of asparagus, cheese, cracker crumbs, butter and almonds. Pour the milk in one side of the dish. Prepare the night before or at least 2 hours in advance. Bake at 350 degrees for 1 hour. Serves 6.

BREADS

My Blogdaughter VW of One Happy Dog Speaks, sends us her recipe for Banana Bread. I think breads are wonderful holiday foods... I love to serve them for breakfast on Thanksgiving or Christmas. VW is an excellent baker, so there is no doubt this is a great recipe.

Oh My. Someone went and did it. ALa71 of Blonde Sagacity submitted a recipe for Coveted Pumpkin Bread. I love Pumpkin bread. I think I like the holidays JUST BECAUSE of Pumpkin Bread...

Also from Allison of AliThinks comes Custardy Popovers. She makes these seem so easy and the way all those kids ate through them... it sounds like a must try!

I decided Stuffing is a Bread and from Amy of Prochein Amy, we have TWO recipes and I am indebted to her. I put out a call to my readers for an Oyster dressing and Amy has come through. So you will find both Barton Oyster Dressing and Granny's Dressing (her Mother-in-Law's cornbread recipe) at Amy's this week. Thank you, Amy!

And from my Mom, we have a recipe good for holiday breakfasts, it is quick and easy. She said I didn't have to post this, she was just supporting me (I love my Mom!), but I wanted to post it as it is very good.

Crescent Orange Rolls
1 8 oz. roll of Pillsbury Crescent Rolls
2 Tbs. butter, melted
1/3 cup sugar
1/4 tsp. cinnamon

Unroll crescent rolls on lightly floured sheet of waxed paper.
Press perforations together. Brush with melted butter and sprinkle combo of sugar and cinnamon on top.
Roll jelly-roll like fashion beginning at long side.
Cut into 9 rolls (or thinner if need be) and place into lightly greased miniature muffin pan.
Bake 375 degrees for 8 to 10 mins. (golden brown).
Bake less if cut into more than 9 rolls.

Take out of pan and glaze.
Glaze:
In small bowl, mix:
1/3 cup sifted powdered sugar
1 Tbs. frozen orange juice concentrate thawed and undiluted
1 tsp. water

DESSERTS

Ohhh, this looks so good. From Gullyborg of Resistance is futile! we have Baked Pears in Gorgonzola. Holy cow. I will not resist. I'm drooling...

Cookies

MaryBeth of Random Thoughts From Mary Beth, sends us recipes for Christmas cookies! Note the plural, recipeS. Yahoo! Yes, it is time for us to think about our baking. Any woman who speaks of Southern Living magazine is a woman after my heart.

Buckethead of The Ministry of Minor Perfidy submits his (no kidding) Great Great Great Grandmother's Cookie recipe. He adds "These cookies are the Citizen Kane, the George Washington, the Shakespeare of sugar cookies". Old family recipe. I'm tryin' it.

Amanda of Aussie Wife, yes, she is from the Land Down Under!, gives us a classic Australian recipe, Anzac Biscuits. I don't have any classic Aussie Recipes in my repertoire and I do believe this will be my first. **Update- I had this up in the bread section not understanding that biscuits in Australian English means cookie and Biscuit in American English means... breakfast bread or something you serve with gravy. Ack! I received an education today and have righted my wrong! **

Thank you for participating. It was my pleasure to read through all your wonderful recipes. I hope everyone is able to glean a recipe or two from here... I know I did!

Next week's hostess is Mary Beth of Random Thoughts From Mary Beth. She posts on November 26th! You know the routine! Deadline... Thursday before... Midnight EST. recipe.carnival (at) gmail (dot) com.

And a very very special thank you to Beth of She Who Will Be Obeyed!, who started this Carnival of the Recipes. Here we are on the 14th round... and I don't know about you, but I have successfully added to my menu in our home. So Thank You, Beth, for getting this started for all of us and keeping it organized!

Look at the BIG Picture

There is all this hubbub about this commercial for some nighttime soap about wives that appeared during Monday Night Football. No, I have not seen it. No, I do not want to. Yes, I am rather tired of hearing about it since it is ALL anyone is talking about. Let me set some people straight here… if you are not horrified by the regular garbage they put out for commercials during regular sports programming, I, quite frankly, don’t want to hear about it from you.

Let me tell you a story.

Two years ago my husband was out of town. My eldest, then 7 years old, wanted to watch baseball on TV. It was 3:00 IN THE AFTERNOON! The boys had requested their favorite dinner I prepare from scratch, a chicken pot pie, and I was taking it out of the oven… a heavy 9x13 filled with chicken pot pie, when I hear from the television something about pen-ile enhancement. I had that pot pie on the stove top, crossed my kitchen and leapt over a couch to turn off the TV before I even got my oven mitt off. I was pissed. (I think the only time I can remember moving faster was last year when some stupid Mom wasn’t watching her non-swimming 2 year old in the pool and the kid started to drown. I was across the pool deck and leapt over 2 lawn chairs, landing fully clothed… with shoes, into the pool rescuing this little girl. Thank God for my agility and speed… full credit going to Karate.)

Anyway, everyone is up in arms about this ad that aired Monday. Give.me.a.damn.break. When they clear up the ads that appear on a daily basis for Viagra, Excite, and all the other junk aimed at ere-ectile dysfunction and things to make s-ex last longer and more memorable (that one cracks me up), ONLY THEN will I get upset over the tripe they showed Monday Night.

Wake up, people. We have bigger problems showing up in our homes during daytime sports. Sit down and take notice. It is truly appalling.

Don't Get Your Lingerie Advice from a Stick Person

They did an article in my local paper about Lingerie. They interviewed these models (modeling for VS no less) about what the trick is to look good in Lingerie.

Tip here people, what makes a 6 foot 100 lb gorgeous woman look good in lingerie just 'ain’t gonna be' what makes ME look good in lingerie.

One of them said it had to be a matchy set. Don’t put lavender panties with a pink bra. Hmm. Honestly, as a mother of three and wife of one, my goal is just to find stuff that is clean… forget that matchy stuff.

Yet another one said heels… you gotta wear heels? Pulease. Give me a frickin’ break. I am not going to walk around my house in lingerie and heels. I’m a 39 year old woman. I frickin’ hate heels, obviously invented by a man who never had to wear them. Just the thought of having to put on heels makes my feet hurt. And trust me, high heels are not always so graceful. Oh yeah, I can see it now, there’s nothing quite so sexy as a woman in lingerie slipping on the tile while wearing heels because some kid spilled a cup of juice on the tile. Lovely. What a dorky idea. I can see heels if you’re putting on special lingerie for that special night… but let’s face it, the lingerie on those nights stays on the body for exactly 5 seconds as would the heels. Moral of the story there, don’t go out spending 50 bucks on a pair of shoes to go with your matchy lingerie as the 5 second wear time 'ain’t worth it'.

Look, for a woman like me, a woman who has put a whole lotta miles on her body, there are only two things that are going to make lingerie look good:

1) A very talented surgeon with a very sharp knife, although there has been some debate as to how sharp the knife has to be. I was talking to one of my husband’s employees who had breast augmentation and I was saying, ‘well, I’d not have that done. I’d have a tummy tuck. What I need is a very talented surgeon with a very sharpe knife” to which she replied, “The knife doesn’t really have to be that sharp”… Yes, she still works for him. And I actually like her. Wicked funny sense of humor.

I digress.

2) And... the last thing that makes lingerie look good on a woman like me is…clothes. As in clothes to wear over it.

It Was Bound to Happen...

…with three boys. I’m not saying it is right. I’m not saying boys will be boys. I’m not happy about it. We’ve had a talk about it. But…

Son#3 was put on time out today during school for lifting up a girl’s skirt. Me thinks he was wondering if girls wear Hulk underwear too.

Guest Blogging

I am guest blogging at VW's of One Happy Dog Speaks has her father has passed away and she is traveling for the funeral. Her Dad was a wonderful man and I am grieving deeply for the family, but am taking solace in the fact he is not suffering. Always the planner, VW left me much happy stuff to post and some pictures of her wonderfully smoochy little men. I will start tomorrow.

I am also guest blogging for Jack over at Random Fate and just posted my newest post over there, on the approval for the Cleveland Clinic to perform the first face transplant. I've been thinking a lot about it since it was released to the news a couple weeks ago...

Last Night's Celebration

In case you are wondering what it is like in the House of Boudicca for an anniversary… this is last night’s take. Don’t worry, it is work safe. My folks read my blog.

A dear friend of mine offered to take ALL THREE of my boys to spend the night Friday night with her son, who is best buds with my eldest. Holy crap. What do you say to that? Well, of course I said yes, but still, how amazingly nice. We have never ever been in our home over night without our kids. So we are saving the going out to dinner “and stuff” for Friday night. Yes, I will NOT be blogging about Friday night. *grin*

So last night I told my husband to go the gym per his usual Tuesday routine and come home whenever and I’d have dinner ready. I had prepared a special dinner, but nothing grand. I don’t like gift giving on Anniversaries. I don’t know why, but I just don’t. I find it annoying. It’s one more thing I have to put on my damn list to do and if he wants something, he buys it anyway, so I hate it. Gift giving holidays are birthdays and Christmas and this year we aren’t exchanging gifts on Christmas because we have hurricane damage to pay for. So as he leaves for work yesterday I yell after him, “Remember! Do NOT get me anything! Do you hear me?!” to which he hollers back from his car, “yes!” It was safe to say the morning of because he never buys anything until the day of. If the mall was open on Christmas day, he would shop on Christmas day.

Am I or am I not a man’s dream of a wife when it comes to this? Granted I am a real pain in the butt as I can be combative and dig my heels in and am very strong minded and strong willed, but when it comes to this gift giving stuff, I am really frickin’ easy. I mean, come on, I bought my own birthday gifts, put them in his closet and said, “Just wrap them with the boys and they’ll be happy”. Of course he was frickin’ LOVING me as September 8 rolled around and every store in Palm Beach County was closed due to devastation from Hurricane Frances. He was completely prepared, however, as his wife had it all taken care of. His big stress was trying to find eggs to bake my cake with the boys.

Anyway, he gets in from the gym last night about 7 and he has two dozen roses. He stopped by and picked them up on his way home. Now, yes, it was sweet, but in my book, folks, this constitutes as 'something'. This is evidently where this whole Mars/Venus thing happens. I said to him, “You weren’t supposed to get me anything!” to which he replies, “This isn’t anything, it’s just flowers! It’s not like its jewelry.” to which I retort, “It is organic matter! IT IS SOMETHING!!” Geez.

Yes, I did thank him. And I put them in water and arranged them… which means they are symmetrically arranged, red, white, red, white, 8 in each quadrant as I’m too left brained and can’t ‘arrange’ frickin’ anything to save my life. In that aspect, I am a very crappy wife.

We’re going to bed last night and he says sheepishly, “Well, I bought this last week. I had to give it to you.” It was two boxes from Hoffman’s candy store, one of peanut brittle and one of Hoffman’s dark chocolate… I am a dark chocolate freak. How could I be mad? I kissed him and said, “Ok. At least I know what I’m having for breakfast tomorrow.”

So here’s my big concern. We completely agreed on NO gift exchanging for Christmas. We’re going to have to revisit this issue so he completely understands when I say NO, I mean really seriously, nothing. It’s just really really unfair to agree to something and then go back on your word. I love Christmas as much as the next, but I am going to have a very bad Christmas if we agree to nothing and then there is something under the tree for me. I’m going to be very hurt amd very very angry. I am hoping to make this very plain and clear. His heart is in the right place, he likes to do nice things for me... but a deal is a deal.

Looky Here!!!!

Me! Me! Me! I am the hostess for Carnival of the Recipes.

Knowns:
E-mail: Recipe.carnival (at) gmail (dot) com
Deadline: Thursday Night, Midnight EST
Content: Recipe
Entrant: Anyone
How: Send link to blog or E-mail Recipe

Unknowns:
None!

So send ‘em in and I’ll write ‘em up!

Preparing for Employment

Well… I found my birth certificate for my proof of citizenship. I filled out my computer and background check information and turned it all in immediately. Today I received this packet of crap I never understand. My husband and his accountant take care of all this stuff called “W-4” and they have it worked on ‘what to claim'. I have no clue. Blech. Just let me work. Heh.

So I call to let HR know I’ve got all the data and I’m hand delivering it and I said something about my starting Monday and she says… “If you pass your background check”. Wha???

If?

I said, “Well, I feel certain I’m going to pass…” and she said, “Oh yeah, we look for felonies, credit, stuff like that.”

Hmm. Felonies. Does THINKING about strangling your husband count, ‘cause that’s happened a couple times in the last four years… (mutual, I assure you) and then there was the time I had this run in with this really nasty old lady from one of those small North Eastern states last Christmas and I really really wanted to run her down with my mini-van just to see her face… it was a fleeting thought… ok, maybe not fleeting, maybe I did dwell on it longer than I should have, but it was a thought. Those don’t count right? And then there’s the whole lusting after some of those beautiful men I saw on the soccer fields… Wait. I’m confusing my laws vs. my 10 commandments. By law I’m allowed to lust, it’s the whole Church thing that frowns upon lusting after someone else when you’re married…

The HR lady then said, “Oh, I didn’t mean 'if', I meant ‘when’… you are at the mercy of the corporation. We can’t bring you in until THEY finish your background check.”

Phew, I was kind of worried there for a minute on what she was thinking when she said ‘if’.

November 16, 1991

Thirteen years ago today… is when my life was finally set on its permanent course that I would no longer roam the Earth alone. I would no longer feel that it was me against the world. I would no longer see me as a single entity, but I would see me as a half of a partnership. Thirteen years ago, I married my husband.

We met 17 years ago in at a bar, believe it or not, funnier still because neither of us drink. I worked at the same company as his brother and his brother’s department was having a Happy Hour at a local bar. A girlfriend of mine worked in the same department as my now brother in law, and invited me to go with her. The minute I met my husband, I knew he was the one.

Amazingly good looking, dark brown hair, dark brown eyes, the most amazing lips… bedroom eyes… he looks like Andy Garcia with a hint of George Clooney. When I first met him he looked to me like the young Al Pacino from the Godfather I. He is 5’6” with shoes, broad shoulders, long fingers and strong hands, 30” waist… when he works out he has the toned body that is cut… the type of body men dream of having with the small waist and broad shoulders. When he doesn’t work out, you can’t tell. He always looks like he stepped out of some fashion magazine. Model perfect. Old women flirt with him shamelessly and if the young women don’t proposition him still, it is only because he can be incredibly cold and aloof…distancing himself from women he feels are dangerous. He is married and he is married to me.

When I met him at the bar, I walked up and sat across from him. I only talked to him although there was much joking and laughter around me. I was dating someone at the time; someone I had been seeing for 2 years and we were talking marriage. Something just never quite felt 100% with the other guy, even though I was madly in love with him. But… when I met my husband, even though I didn’t really know him, I could tell he was a good man, he was smart and respectful and I could tell… that.he.was.the.one. and that everything was right and nothing was wrong.

I called my Mom that night and said, “I met the man whose children I’m going to bear” and she said, “But you’re practically engaged to Kevin” and I replied, “I know. I made a mistake. This is the one.”

Of course my eventual husband didn’t know that. I tried to get him to go out with me, but he was seeing someone. But over the course of the year, I would be somewhere and he would too, by pure coincidence. It was weird. So I would hang out with him and his brother and slowly he got to know me. There were times where I think you could say I kind of chased him down like a dog. Then one day in March, 16 years ago, he asked me out. After the first week of dating, we were inseparable, never living together, but having dinner together every night and spending every waking moment together on weekends. We never broke up, it just felt right immediately. We were married 2 1/2 years later.

And it’s been 13 years. I’ve forgotten our anniversary once. I’ve scheduled our dinner on the WRONG day. Last year on our anniversary someone asked me how many years we were married and I got the wrong number. Actually, it went something like this:

Person: “So, how many years have you been married?”
Me: “13 years.”
Husband: “13? I thought it was only 12.”
Me: “No. 13.”
Husband: “We got married in ’91. It is now 2003. My math says 12 years.”
Me: “Oh. You’re right.”
Me looking at person who asked the original question: “12 years. We’ve been married 12 years.”

So this year I got it right. 13 years. He is my soul mate. There are days we surely look at each other and think, “What was I thinking?!!!” There have been days where barely a civil word can be said. But there are days I call him at work just because I need to hear HIS voice. There are days when I cannot wait for him to come through that door… that I can’t wait to see him, hear him, smell him. More days than not, I cannot keep my hands off of him and when he travels, I have to sleep with his pillow near me so I can still smell him when I sleep.

If something were to happen to him… I would be forever lost for he is my compass. He is what keeps me grounded. He is what makes me realize I am not alone. He makes me complete.

Happy Anniversary, Love.

I Am The Hostess...

Send me recipes!!!!

This week the Carnival of the Recipes is hosted by... ME!!! So send your recipes to recipe.carnival (at) gmail (dot) com. (Standard procedure, replace the parethesis content with the real stuff.)

Remember: You do not have to be a blogger. If you are a blogger, just send me the link. If you are not a blogger, send me the actual recipe and I will post it in its entirety, giving you full credit.

Deadline: Midnight, Thursday, EST.

Done Deal

I had my 'interview' today. First, the security lady kinda scared me. Wow, you would have thought I was there to steal trade secrets. I was glad when she said at the end I was allowed to go to the restroom by myself without my male escort, K. I've known K. for 17 years. When his group offered me coffee I joked, "NO, I don't dare. I might have to use the restroom and I can't remember whether I need a damn escort" to which he replied, "Oh, well... I don't have to come into the actual stall with you... " and he grinned.

It was like a homecoming. I didn't even bother to shake anyone's hand. I just hugged them all. I hadn't realized how much I missed them. And it felt so mutual. As I was leaving, my new boss gave me a big grin and he said, "I am SO happy. This is just goodness." He has handpicked everyone working for him. Only the nice people from where I worked before. And the folks who were team players. And laid back. And wonderful.

They told me they had greased the skids with the director and it was a done deal. Later on, they showed me a list of everyone working for them to see who else I knew... and they already had my name on the list. I acted like I didn't notice, but my heart grew so warm.

I walked in with the director who actually seemed like a nice guy. Very professional. He asked me what I wanted to make, I told him and he said, "OK." It was over.

One job.
No haggling over money.
Aerospace. I love military aircraft.
I'm working any hours I can work, they don't care as long as I keep them posted.
10 hours min.
A dream project.
I'm back in my field.
GREAT people.
5 minutes from my kid's school... I no longer have to drive to a swamp. (That is not a joke.)
15 minutes from my house.
It fell in my lap.

I kept saying to my Mom over and over, "This cannot be happening to me. I'm a Mom. I get to keep being a full time Mom. I get to work back in my field. For only 10 hours. I'm working on a great project with awesome people... with my old mentor and one of my best guy buddies. And I didn't even look for it... it all found me."

I'm stunned. And I feel so blessed. And I'm so happy.

And I start Monday. I will be using my brain again starting Monday.

On Second Thought, I'll Pass on the Pringles

THIS Post by blog sister Sally of Whimsy Capricious reminded me of a story...

We had just made the 9 hour trip back from my folk's house about 3 years ago. We stopped at Publix 5 minutes from home so we could get milk and dinner. My husband went in and I stayed with the boys. The van was full of crap, nobody had shoes on, I was a total wreck and I was beat. Suddenly I heard the dreaded words from Son#1, 'Mom... I have to pee."

I'm pretty sure one of the boys was asleep and the thought of getting them all out of the car, with shoes on, and taking 3 boys ages 2, 4. and 6 into the restroom was more than my frayed nerves could handle. So... I decided to do what mothers of boys sometimes do, and I looked for something for Son#1 to pee in. The only thing I could find was an empty Pringles can. See... when you travel with kids... it's all about the snacks.

Well, Son#1 peed in the can and then looked into it and said, "Hey, I see chips floating in there." Evidently there were Pringles remnants in the can. Next thing I know, sleeping boy is now awake, all boys are unbuckled, there is much positive energy in the car and I'm hearing, "Wait! Mom! I want to see the floating Pringles!" and here I am, sitting in the back of my mini van, with a Pringles can full of pee and floating chip crumbs thinking, "I so did not expect my life to be like this."

Tastes Like Cantaloupe Juice

OK, this is just too funny. I found this post via The Zero Boss. Metro Dad has this hysterical post called High Stakes Gambling at Home. A hysterical read.

And, BTW, no, my husband and I never tried it. The thought made the both of us want to gag. We had all his employees over for a Christmas party one year (Yes, I cooked a 5 course meal for all employees and their spouses… we did NOT do that the next year) and some how this topic got brought up. I was surprised enough with the course of discussion, but nearly spit water across the table when the sweet quiet husband of one of the women who works in Hunhead’s office said, ‘Well, we don’t have kids, but I hear it tastes like cantaloupe juice.” (Quoted from the TV show Friends.)

Funny stuff.

A Few Things About Thyroid Cancer

The meeting I was heading up the other day had a speaker on Thyroid Cancer. The surgeon who spoke is highly thought of in our area and she was one helluva speaker. It was extraordinarily informative.

I have many friends who have had Thyroid Cancer and where I know the treatment they have received, I just always assumed there was only one type of Thyroid Cancer. I wasn’t aware there are multiple types as in Leukemia. 75% of Thyroid Cancers are Papillary and have an excellent success rate for 5 year remission. I want to say upwards of 80%. But then she told us of the other three kinds, listing them out for us in order of incidence, the last being the least common, but the most dangerous.

3-5% of all Thyroid Cancers are what they call Anaplastic. It is a very aggressive Thyroid Cancer and does not respond well to the conventional removal and radiation treatments of Papillary Cancer. It tends to strike over the age of 65. Metastasis occurs in the lung of 50% of all patients by the time of diagnosis. Tracheal invasion is present in 25% cases upon diagnosis. It occurs in men more often than women 2-1.

Wondering where I’m going with this? She said that although information is not being given on Chief Justice Rehnquist, the specialists in this field have been able to put together what little information that have received about his case and they feel that more than likely Anaplastic Thyroid Cancer is probably what he has. She said they don’t know for sure, but this is what they are speculating based on what they have heard in the news.

It doesn’t look good.

Has it REALLY Come to THIS???

They had an article in our paper today that some areas are instituting something called Silent Saturday. No it is not religious. It has to do with not being able to coach or cheer from the sidelines of the Soccer field. All parents and coaches must stay silent, although the coach is allowed to place kids. They can’t yell at a kid across the field picking daisies to look alive because the ball is right there. They can’t holler at the kid running the wrong way with the ball… reminding them what team they’re on and what goal to kick it in. They can’t cheer when a kid makes a good play or kicks a goal. They can’t remind the goalie to pay attention and quit trying to hang themselves in the goal net. Nope. None.

I realize where they’re coming from. I’ve heard about rude parents, but this one area down near Lauderdale that instituted this new policy, didn’t have that problem. The new guy who came from an area that already had Silent Saturday, just placed it.

I hope they don’t place that policy down here. Soccer ended this past Saturday. Trust me, there was not a happier parent than I that it is finally over, but in the area where my kids play soccer, there is no nastiness. The parents are into the games and we cheer for either team as they make a goal or a great play. All the coaches carry on afterwards saying, “Did y’all have fun?!” There's one coach gets the jerseys of all the kids and they decorate them with their names and stars and stuff. Then there's another coach always makes special head bands for all his kids out of bandanas. These are great great guys. You should see them huddled with the 5 year olds, sitting on the ground Indian style, goofing off about the game… these coaches are really into kids, as they must be because if you have not watched 5 and 6 year olds play soccer… you have missed out on a real treat. And let me say, it is really only the treat the first two games, after that it is boring as hell.

The kids thrive on positive reinforcement. If we were all forced to sit on the sidelines and say NOTHING, I have a feeling the kids would not have the same energy they have now. Don’t get me wrong… I’m not one of those that cheers constantly. As a matter of fact, I’m the type of Mom that brings a good book and reads when my kid isn’t playing and sometimes even when he is; however, I’m also the Mom that finds herself having to cup her hands around her mouth and say, “Son, which way are you running? Which goal do you want to kick into?” just to remind him. Or better yet when he’s goalie, “Hey! Little buddy, here comes the ball. Wake up!” Or even, “Bones! (That’s his nickname) Try kicking the ball!” as he hippety skippety crosses the field.

On our team of 9 kids, there were 2 boys and 3 girls consistently focused. The other 4… not so much. And this was a good year. One year, we had a team where we had 2 out of 9 kids who really wanted to play. The other 7 wanted to look for lady bugs in the grass or stop mid-game and braid each other’s hair. Nobody is yelling and screaming at the kids… they’re young, but I will say, there is a lot of positive encouragement from the sidelines. It keeps the kids focused and reminds them what they’re there for… to have a good time AND play the game. And let me tell you when it’s a really good thing... occasionally you’ll get a 5-6 year old team that is stacked with kids whose Dad’s used to play soccer in S. America, I’m talking all pro types. These kids were born with soccer balls in their hands. Trust me, when the average team plays a stacked team, it takes A LOT of encouragement from the parents and coaches on the way way losing team to keep those kids motivated. Even young kids don’t like to feel like they’re being slaughtered in a game.

So I am hoping they don’t institute Silent Saturday even though I am in fact one of those silent Moms that prefers to read.