Location: Palm Beach County, Florida, United States

Recently have been told I look like Mary Ann from Gilligan's Island. I hadn't heard that in years, but that is a good place to start as to what I look like, although she had a better bod. I have three boys and have been married for 13 years. Born of a Navy family, in Hawaii, one Mom, one Dad, one sister and one brother. The eldest of three children. BS in Applied Mathematics. Consider Pensacola my home town although I moved every 2-3 years of my life growing up. Currently work in the aerospace industry in an engineering position while being a Mom. Of Celtic heritage and very proud of it.

Monday, August 09, 2004

Thank You, Grau, for Setting Us Free!

Well, it finally happened. A man has discovered our secrets about purses. As Blog father Grau of Frizzensparks put it,

But given the expertise that a lifetime of studying fictional sci-fi technology has given me, I can say without a doubt that a woman's purse can not only hold more than it's spatial dimensions would suggest, occasionally the fabric of time/space acts gets ripped near them and strange things occur. It's like a TARDIS for tampons.
Women have been keeping this secret from us from generations. Centuries of assorted lost feminine items are drifting through alternate realities, only to reappear through dimensional tears. I swear one day I saw my wife pull an 18th century cast iron curling iron from her tote, then immediately use it to bash the tentacle of some otherdimensional thing back down into the gaping maw of her handbag.

And of course it doesn’t end there. You gotta read it because it's very funny stuff.

The secret is unlocked. Damn. I was really hoping we could hold on to this deceit forever. It was inevitable, however, that someone find out and tell the world what our purses are really about. I mean, truly, the lying and constant trying to hide the truth, really was getting old.

All the Matchbox cars were a ruse. The melted crayons… all a ploy. The dried up cheerios and gummy candies… all part of the cover up. And the extra 20 lbs, wasn’t really spare change consisting of pennies, dimes, and quarters, having found their way to the bottom of my purse over time as I quickly threw it in there instead of looking for my wallet since a child was screaming in my ear that he had to pee or all three kids had somehow thrown me into sensory overload and I was just looking to get the hell out of the store. Screw the wallet! The change still made the damn purse!

Ahhh… it just feels so good knowing we don’t have to hide it anymore. The truth is out and it is liberating! (Grin!)


Blogger Contagion said...

It's about time one of you women admited to what was going on. Although it would have been handier 12 hours ago before my wife made me go shoe shoping for 5 hours after learning the truth...

9:48 PM  
Blogger Anathematized1 said...

I mentioned the manpurse on Grau's site - complete with link (somewhat frightening might I add)...Sucking them into our insidious plot to battle the alien creatures one "murse" toting man at a time.

12:00 AM  

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