Location: Palm Beach County, Florida, United States

Recently have been told I look like Mary Ann from Gilligan's Island. I hadn't heard that in years, but that is a good place to start as to what I look like, although she had a better bod. I have three boys and have been married for 13 years. Born of a Navy family, in Hawaii, one Mom, one Dad, one sister and one brother. The eldest of three children. BS in Applied Mathematics. Consider Pensacola my home town although I moved every 2-3 years of my life growing up. Currently work in the aerospace industry in an engineering position while being a Mom. Of Celtic heritage and very proud of it.

Friday, August 13, 2004

Living Another Life in My Dreams

I wasn’t going to blog on this, it never occurred to me, but when my sister and I were talking about some odd dreams we had, she said I should throw this out there, so here you go. (BTW, her dream was really weird… she wins the weird dream category.) Also, since then, I have had it interpreted and I think I'm cool with the interpretation.

Two nights ago I dreamt I was in the ocean. I mean IN the ocean as in deep underwater swimming, not at some beach. I’m talking Atlantic or Pacific. There were other people, a few, people I know, I felt familiarity, so I gather it was family. Don’t know. Maybe it was close friends. But I am swimming and I am not afraid and the ocean is vast and very clear to me. I can see even though it is darkish at times. I am swimming deep and I can swim to the very bottom and I can breathe underwater. I don’t have to surface. I am aware there are things I should be afraid of, sharks and such, and I see them, but for some reason I’m not afraid or I know that they won’t endanger me.

But what is still bothering me about this dream is the feeling of the ocean floor. It was not hard, like land. It was membranous. Like a mucous membrane, that was not wet. Like an eye. A vulnerable membrane. It had a cellular structure and in my mind, as I am hovering over it, I am aware it is very much part of something alive and I am afraid to touch it. Others touch it with their toes (I am clothed in this dream, just no shoes), but I do not. I am not so much afraid as I am totally skeeved out at the thought of touching it. The Earth is alive and this is its surface… and the feeling I have about touching it is the same feeling I have about touching an eye or someone touching my eye, touching a hugely vulnerable part of a body. But I am also aware, that there are times when people touch it that it is no longer membranous, but rather dust kicks up and the ocean floor is solid there, hard like land, because that part of the floor is dead.

So that’s it. The earth is alive, I can breathe underwater, and I’m not afraid of sharks, but am creeped out at touching the ocean floor.

It’s not the first time I’ve had a dream like this, swimming in the open ocean, unafraid, able to breathe underwater. Just the first time with this whole Earth is alive ocean floor thing.


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