Family is First, Even if You Hate Fishing
My blog brother, _Jon of We Swear, recently posted on how much he hated fishing, yet he went because he wanted to spend time with his Dad and Uncle, fearing this is the last time they would be able to be together like this. He basically took the time, to make a memory, knowing that opportunity may never arise again. How many of us do that? It takes something life altering at times to do things like that. It shouldn't, but it does.
So here is my life altering experience, that would have me on a fishing boat with family... to create a memory.
The Great Omnipotent One has a four generational picture. It is my brother as a baby, him, his Dad, and my Great Grandfather. It's priceless. My GreatGrandfather died probably 4 or 5 years later. My Mom has one also. She as a toddler, her Mom, my Greatgrandmother, and my Great Great Grandmother.
Five years ago for my mother in laws November birthday, I got a gift certificate for Sears photography and told my sister in law that she needed to get a 3 generational picture of my niece, her, and my mother in law. By getting the gift certificate, it wasn't a 'should', I was forcing her hand in the issue. To this day, I do not know why. I told her about our family pictures and how valuable they are... same sex multi generational pictures. So they did it, and I know there was much grumbling on my sister in law and niece's part and I am sure, my mother in law being the saintly person she was, also very frugal, was telling them that 'we can't waste this! It's money!' or "We have to do it for her, she will be offended and it is a good idea." In a matter of months after the photo shoot, my mother in law was gone. Never sick a day in her life, and suddenly, via massive stroke she was no longer with us. It was horrible and gut wrenching as the death of a mother is. I loved this woman. Still do.
My sister in law came up to me later and thanked me profusely for making her take the time to get the picture. They had lunch that day. They laughed. And as much as she didn't want to do it (my sister in law), she said she was so glad they did after it was over and now... now she is forever thankful that they have the picture and the memory.
And now I am like _Jon. I will take those times to do things that I may not necessarily really want to do, because you never know when it's too late.
posted by Bou | 9:00 PM
4 Comments:
That is so very true.
It's funny, my niece decided - after hef flight was booked and all arrangments made, that she wasn't coming down with her Mom afterall. She wanted to go to wristband day at the county fair. (WTF?!?!)
So I called her to get her side. She said to me "if you had to choose between being bored with family or having fun, what would you do?" My answer-exactly what I did last month. Spend time with Family.
We've lost so many close to us, I cherish every boring moment I can get with them!
Something that still haunts me. I'm very family oriented, family first at all times. But 19 years ago, I had a chance to see my grandfather for the last time. The poor man was physically strong, but he couldn't remember anything after he arrived in the States. He started thinking that he was back in Germany, and the last time I had seen him, he thought that I was a relative back from the army. It really tore me up.
My Ma went to see him one Saturday, and asked if any of us kids would like to go with. The other three went, I stayed. I thought I couldn't handle him not knowing who I was.
He died two weeks later. And, of course it was too late, I realized that I couldn't handle not being able to see him one last time.
You do things with family. You don't know when they'll be taken from you.
There's 8 kids in my family, and after we were all grown up & moved away, it was almost impossible to get us all in the same spot.
As it happened, all 8 of us made it down for our mother's funeral, and a picture was taken.
Couple years later, my oldest brother died.
We're glad to have that picture.
_Jon said ...
Wow. Well put.
I was on the phone with my Uncle as I was reading this. He thanked me for coming along when he knew I was bored to death.
And I sit here watching Johnny Cash's "Hurt" video on Launch.com. It is haunting, that video. He shows clips of his life. He recorded it months before his wife did, about a year before he passed. One of the lyrics; "I wear this crown of thorns, upon this liars chair, full of broken thoughts, that I cannot repair." I know it isn't his song, but dang is it appropriate for him and his life. It is damnd *haunting*.
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