He'll have the Stadium Seating in the Bathroom, Thank You!
On Wednesdays during the summer months I hire a sitter for four hours in the afternoon and I run errands. Grocery shop, banking, dry cleaning, etc. The kids love it because they HATE doing errands and love their sitter, I love it because I hate running errands with them, and my sitter loves it because he needs the money. So today was errand day.
I was in a restroom in a store and in the stall next to me came a little boy and his grandmother. I come out to wash my hands and I hear him say, “Ahhhhh”. His grandmother starts to laugh and says, “Wow. You really had to go that bad.” I’m smiling to myself. Then I hear him say, “Hey, Grandma! Did you hear that toot?” Now I’m stifling a laugh. Finally I hear him say, “OK, Grandma, it’s now time for me to shake it, but not break it.” Now I am laughing out loud as they come out of the stall.
My question had been answered. I have been wondering when the time will come that I will no longer live in fear of embarrassment or humiliation when I am in a public restroom. The answer is: when I no longer have to go in with a small child. Son#3 still has to come in with me and I cringe every time we go. I would almost rather wet myself then have to take him. We have thankfully moved past his need to outwardly comment on what kind of underwear I’m wearing. I love it when that happens. LOOOOVE IT!!! (rolling my eyes) I am now at the point where if he has gone to the bathroom first, I immediately give him the evil eye so he doesn’t fling the door open when it’s my turn. You think I joke; I do not. We still, unfortunately, feel this need to describe all that passes through his small body while in a public restroom. I nearly die every time. “Oh look Mom! It’s bright blue. That means we had Superman ice cream last night!” Yeah, that’s what it means to him, but to me I keep wondering if Blue Die #whatever causes some sort of colon cancer later in life.
I need a damn life. This is, what?, the second post in two days on bathroom stuff.
2 Comments:
I've GOT to get some Superman ice cream :-)
That stuff is just foul. You find it at Baskin Robbins and those stores... its also Rainbow Ice cream.. it's got this bright blue. Blech.
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