Name:
Location: Palm Beach County, Florida, United States

Recently have been told I look like Mary Ann from Gilligan's Island. I hadn't heard that in years, but that is a good place to start as to what I look like, although she had a better bod. I have three boys and have been married for 13 years. Born of a Navy family, in Hawaii, one Mom, one Dad, one sister and one brother. The eldest of three children. BS in Applied Mathematics. Consider Pensacola my home town although I moved every 2-3 years of my life growing up. Currently work in the aerospace industry in an engineering position while being a Mom. Of Celtic heritage and very proud of it.

Wednesday, October 13, 2004

The Times They Are A Changin'

Things have changed since I was in school. The reading material is far different... and the Math... wow.

Son#1 is a voracious reader. He has a book with him everywhere he goes. Unfortunately, we have been stuck on Harry Potter since 2nd grade. I finally put my foot down last month and said we have to find new reading material. Luckily another boy in his class turned him onto the Lemony Snicket Series. So far there are something like 11 or 12 books in that series, so it should keep us busy. I'm not thrilled its below is reading level, but hey, he's reading something other than Harry Potter, so that is great strides.

Today he was thrilled. His teacher let him borrow a book from her class. Thrilled isn't really the correct word. Ecstatic works. Mental cartwheels is good. It is called... yes, I am serious... The Day My Butt Went Psycho. And here is a synopsis for your reading pleasure:

Zack Freeman is ready to tell his story... the story of a brave young boy and his crazy runaway butt. The story of a crack butt-fighting unit called the B-team, a legendary Butt Hunter's formidable daughter, and some of the ugliest and meanest butts to ever roam the face of the earth. A story of endurance that takes Zack on an epic journey across the Great Windy Desert, through the Brown Forest, and over the Sea of Butts before descending into the heart of an explosive buttcano to confront the biggest, ugliest, meanest butt of them all! It's a story you and your butt will never forget!

And Thank The Boy Butt Gods of the Universe that there is this:

"Just when you thought it was safe . . .the butts are back."Andy Griffiths' sequel to The Day My Butt Went Psycho! is called Zombie Butts From Uranus.

I'm stunned by the things we will do to get our kids to read. Butts. It must not just be my boys that think they are funny. This must be an all over the world phenomonen. Incredible. And the best part? He's writing a book report. I can't wait to hear this one.

When he started his homework, he had some questions with his math, a first. He brings it over to me, just to clarify. Holy Crap Lion Tours! My 4th grader is doing ALGEBRA! Whaaa? No kidding, this is one of the questions:

Solve the following problem: 25-(8+4)

Oh then they were doing things like, solve the problem with y=12. y+3=?.

Now he did not have one problem with any of this. His problem was, "how do you write an expression?" The rest was cake for him. And I also realize, this is not hard stuff, but the concepts, already? Don't get me wrong, I am a very happy Mom, but wow.

Am I the only one who did not have this in 4th grade? We had massive amounts of long division. Pages and pages. Roman Numerals. A lot of long multiplication. Over and over. Wow. I feel old.

12 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Zombie Butts From Uranus? Is there a hidden meaning there?
TGOO

10:03 PM  
Blogger Harvey said...

I'm gonna try to have someone get me the butt book for X-mas :-)

As for Algebra? Not until 7th grade.

12:21 AM  
Blogger Anathematized1 said...

Reminds me of a book I bought for Grau's son..I think it was last Christmas. The title: "Walter the Farting Dog".

I BELIEVE that he saved a family from a robber or something with the might and bravery of his flatulent arse.

1:53 AM  
Blogger Anathematized1 said...

OK, looked up the book and had COMPLETELY forgotten about the cover. Here is a link. Hmmmm, no wonder Grau doesn't let me come over much. Between this book and the fact I have his son thinking I'm a hermaphrodite, I sure wouldn't either. That "work" thing is just a miserable excuse.

http://www.northatlanticbooks.com/products/1583940537.html

2:02 AM  
Blogger Sally said...

I read somewhere that age nine is the average age that kids can cope with abstracts.

This post reminds me of that Simpsons episode where the Principal says, "Lets throw out these old textbooks with all that Base Five crap in them". Base anything but ten tormented me at school.

3:56 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Well, even if the LS books are below his reading level, they are not below _your_ humor level, and the two of you should enjoy reading them together. In fact, I think they're funnier for adults who will get all of the snarky jokes and made-up words (which are no where near as made up as they seem at first) and silly definitions and obscure literary references (much like a good animaniacs cartoon....). I hope you and son#1 enjoy them

Caltechgirl

4:01 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Well, even if the LS books are below his reading level, they are not below _your_ humor level, and the two of you should enjoy reading them together. In fact, I think they're funnier for adults who will get all of the snarky jokes and made-up words (which are no where near as made up as they seem at first) and silly definitions and obscure literary references (much like a good animaniacs cartoon....). I hope you and son#1 enjoy them

Caltechgirl

4:02 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hmmm - 4th grade. He should be about ready for Robert Heinlein's kid books! Some of those stories are still favorites of mine. Then there are the Hardy Boys books - which I believe they have updated (boo-hiss) to more modern themes - but fun anyway to solve the mysteries.

I'll have to think about it for a bit - I was a voracious reader back then. But I think some of the books would be very hard to find - loved sci-fi, mystery, and series books. I read Agatha Christie (all I could find in the library), sci-fi by a guy named Christopher White (I think that's the name - fun interplanetary adventures), Nancy Drew, Cherry Ames, Bobsey Twins, Hardy Boys... and so forth and so on. Oh yeah - if you can find Lester Del Rey - I had one called "The Runaway Robot" that was excellent fun. I still have the book and wouldn't give it up for anything. Some of his other books are good too - although it's been ages and ages since I've read them.

At that age my son resisted reading as hard as he could - so I don't have anything he did to go by. Good Luck and you are so lucky he loves reading!
-- Teresa

8:48 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Let him try the "Mad Scientists' Club" (series) by Bertrand R. Brinley. Good stuff!

Nice blog. I was randomly surfing and got here from a cheesecake recipe...

jlb
jlbussey.typepad.com

3:40 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

How come no one mentioned the Tom Swift books? Oh, I know.... it's because you young whippersnappers have NEVER HEARD OF THEM!!
Seriously, though, there are some great classics such as Treasure Island, and lots of biographies written for that age. They provide a background in history as well.
TGOO

4:20 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! You said "butt"! Lots of times!

Jeff (Au fait)

4:26 PM  
Blogger Boudicca said...

I'm making lists of all these books!

And jlb, thank you.

As for Jeff: butt butt butt butt... when you have boys, you say butt a lot!

4:58 PM  

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